An Open Letter to ‘Boss’

An Open Letter to ‘Boss’

Dear Boss,

It is with great hesitancy I’m penning down my thoughts. Hesitancy because I’m not sure if what I feel and my opinion is in sync with ‘Management Strategy’ for driving business and people productivity and I’m also scared of repercussions of being ‘Right’, so termed as rebellious. In fact this hesitancy is the reason I’m writing this letter…. Why should I feel hesitant???….

I’ve been going over this several times in my mind, trying to figure if I’m completely ‘Right’, if I’m ‘Smart’ enough to understand ‘Management’ well, if I’ll be able to articulate my thoughts in ‘Required Professional’ language, if I have enough ‘Data’ supporting what I have to say, etc., etc., etc.…….

While sitting alone in the office canteen, on Saturday late evening, sipping tea, I realised my desire to make the conversation ‘Perfect’ was driven by hesitancy, was driven by fear….. Fear of losing respect (being insulted), fear of losing credibility, fear of being termed as rebellious (I already mentioned that above) or say ‘Un-Fit’ for our company’s culture (someone who doesn’t ‘Understand’ what we expect here)… But all said and done, ‘It did not feel good’….

I wanted to be out with my friends / spouse / parents / kids spending the weekend, but I’m sitting in office not because I have pending work, but because I need to finish the ‘required’ no. of clock hours… Yes, it definitely does not feel good and for sure doesn’t make sense to me…

This is not how I want to ‘Feel’ at a place I spend more time than my home… I am not a ‘Management Expert’, but there are few things which ABSOLUTELY do not make sense, they violate rules of ‘Common Sense’….

I’ll attempt at describing my thoughts ‘without’ being concerned about all those things creating my hesitation….

I took up a job not just to earn a living, selling vada-pav on street can fetch me money to earn a living, may be more money than this job… But I took up this specific job because I am good at it as compared to all other things in my life… There’s a lot to learn, we all keep learning at all times, but I know my job decent enough to do it well… Things start to become a turn-off when it comes to doing something which is not a regular routine… Guess what, coincidently, my job is to look into things which are not a part of casual routine smooth operations, my job requires my part of ‘intellectual creativity’ and my part of ‘subjective’ decision making in way of doing things… My job on daily basis is a very thin line between using what I already know and learning something new every moment…

I am not concerned with skipping an hour or two of work for personal pleasure and I’m not concerned with seeking opportunities when my boss is not around so I can ‘chill’… I am not ‘Kam Chor’, but the way I’m treated often makes me question myself on investing my efforts…

I don’t need a Security Guard ‘controlling’ my behaviour, I need a Mentor who can ‘HELP’ me find better ways of doing things…

When I attempt at listing down my expectations from the ‘Bosses’ (You) I go back to my purpose of being in this job… Reiterating… My purpose is not solely making money, I can do that in thousand other ways, my purpose is moving ahead in my career… Using skills I already have and learning something new from those who have been doing this since ages (You)… but when I walk-in to office, this is what happens…

Ø  First thing, when I walk-in at 9:40 instead of 9:30, I’m expected to be ready with an explanation for being late… An explanation where realistic answers like, I got up late or it took a little while longer for the watchman to turn on water supply or my kid’s school bus came late, are ABOLUTELY NOT ACCEPTABLE… Since ‘Reality’ is not acceptable, all I can do is lie…

Ø  Since I was rushing to be on-time in office, I did not eat anything, so after I get in office, I freshen up and go to canteen to have a cup of tea, with constant watch on my wrist watch and constantly hoping no one from ‘Bosses’ (You especially) see me hanging out here spending few extra minutes…

Ø  When I get back to work attempting to finish my left-over work from yesterday evening, I get called IN for morning meet and new work is assigned to me with a deadline… All my attempts to share realistic approach on timelines are turned down referring to me as ‘in-efficient’, so to avoid further embarrassment, I lie again and take up the work…

Ø  While doing my job, I’m seldom concerned about better way of doing things, I’m super upset with myself for not being capable and being ‘in-efficient’ in doing my job on time… entire rush is to finish things as quick as possible… Just so there’s no further embarrassment…

Ø  While I take lunch break, it is the only time I get to spend talking to those I want to or checking my social media and doing things ‘I Like’, with a constant watch on my wrist watch…

Ø  While the focus of job is to do things on deadlines, the quality definitely takes second preference. In the event of any mistakes, I’m mocked, being referred to as incapable of doing the job right… Wouldn’t it be a lot easier to accept that human beings make mistake when in rush and I’m hired because I’m capable of doing things right… But I think somehow that derogatory remark is supposed to want me to make things ‘Right’ in ‘Impressing’ my ‘Boss’ (You)…

Ø  Towards end of day when the unrealistic deadlines set are not achieved, my struggle with myself is to leave ‘On-Time’… I could not help but feel scared about being late tomorrow as I would reach home late and spend some less time with family / myself and sleep late… Of course not to mention that feeling of ‘worthlessness’ of spending even a minute more in office when coming late by even a minute is not acceptable and to add to it, guilt of not spending enough time and energy with my loved ones, who deserve it and appreciate me…

Ø  In the struggle, eventually, I leave the unfinished job and I’m labelled as someone who doesn’t take ownership of commitments. Btw, those commitments were made to avoid embarrassment in the first place just because you were not willing to accept I am human and the deadlines set were not humanly possible…

Ø  While travelling back home feeling ‘terrible’ about wasting another day of life, I kept wondering who taught these so called ‘Bosses’ (You) to be that way? What made them (You) get convinced with the idea that driving people with close monitoring, control, fear, etc. gives high productivity? Which B-School teaches these philosophies…

The distinction I realised is ‘Bosses need to learn better ways of Teaching’…

The basic belief that I’m a ‘Kam Chor’ by nature has to be replaced by the understanding that I’m here to work, I’m here to earn an honest living, I’m here to contribute and learn at the same time…

I realised that most of the ‘Bosses’ are promoted when they’re excellent in doing their job as an individual with their technical / functional skills… When they are made ‘Bosses’ they are expected to make their team perform at similar levels… You possibly went through few classroom training sessions on ‘People Management’ but most the learning came from practical experience.… A lot of what I expressed above is something you still feel as a team member to someone and knowingly or unknowingly you are expected to behave the same way…. This reminds me of the statement Saas bhi kabhi Bahu thi… ;-)

I realised that it’s not your fault… you were asked to make me deliver results similar to what you’ve delivered during your days and you’ve tried a lot to teach me how to do things which helped you… Every act of yours which kept you upbeat in your previous role, the ‘path’ you used to achieve your results is what you’re trying to teach me…. Sometime by explaining, sometimes by ordering, sometimes by setting rules, sometime by challenging my ego and doing everything you can to make me deliver my best… Sam Daam Dand Bhed… You were taught philosophies like ‘no pain no gain’, to achieve something one has to be pushed out of ‘comfort’ zone… Fear drives people to perfection, etc. etc. etc….

I realised you’re just trying hard to be an ‘Ideal’ Boss and whatever the world has presented to you as successful ‘Bosses’, said or unsaid, is what you’re trying to do… You do what you do because ‘Your Boss’ does this and so does ‘His Boss’ and it has been apparently ‘proven’ to be an effective way of driving people productivity… Well, most certainly it has gained tag line of ‘The Most Popular Way’ of doing things, but is it really ‘The Best Way’ of doing things or is there a ‘better way’???...

The concern here is much bigger than just you ‘acting’ as a people’s person or comforting me being sensitive… It is about we all together as an entire civilisation of corporate ‘Bosses’ need to learn more about Human Motivation…. We all believe ‘Fear’ does it’s job well, we all believe ‘Carrot & Stick’ (Reward & Punish) is the ultimate and most practical tool to make people achieve things… No wonder we have so many RnRs (Rewards & Recognition) and so many PIPs (Performance Improvement Plan) programs driving entire organisation’s people productivity…. But I somehow strongly feel there’s more to it… There’s a lot more to Human Motivation than the dialogue from ‘3 Idiot’… 99% marks laaoge to ghadi varna chadi’…

I’ll share a story, an incident that occurred with one of my ex-bosses… In his early days, he was once waiting for bus at Worli bus-stop… There was a Mercedes car showroom behind it and he was enjoying the view of those fantastic cars… A salesman from the showroom approached him, asked him to come inside and see the cars… he had nothing else much to do, so he accepted the invitation…. The salesperson calmly explained features and models, moreover, leaving my ex-boss awe-struck he offered a test drive… Of course my ex-boss was a little hesitant saying he couldn’t possibly afford the car, but with a little further insistence he gladly accepted the offer… He had a fantastic ride and relished the experience while the salesman was explaining various features during the drive…. When he left the show-room he was certain about one thing… Jab bhi aukaad hoga Mercedes hi lunga… (Whenever in my life I can afford, I will buy ONLY Mercedes)… Doesn’t matter if BMW is cheaper or Audi has better features, he had decided to buy Mercedes….

There is no Reward or Punishment for buying Mercedes, but he’s amazingly strongly motivated to buy Mercedes…. Why is it so? And moreover, What is at work here which we fail to use in our office?

Again reiterating, I don’t think it’s your fault… We had basics of almost all varied subjects taught in school, including moral ethics, but I don’t remember studying ANYTHING about Human Psychology…. Not even basics… We are all in the race of being better Leaders, being better at driving people, being better at ‘Teaching’ people, being better at ‘getting things done by people’, but surprisingly very little focus is given on teaching and understanding how does Human Mind / Human Motivation work…

I am writing this letter because I found this as a ‘better way’ of communicating my complete thoughts, which I might not have been able to while talking to you…. Similarly, we all constantly try to learn ‘better way’ of doing things… I presume you are also (knowingly / unknowingly) in the search of ‘better way’ of ensuring your team members, like me, always achieve better productivity…

Me as future ‘Boss’ and you as a team member to someone, let us together focus on understanding:

We need to ‘Learn Better Ways toTeach’…

You as Boss need to accept ‘Reality’ that people make mistakes and believe that I do not intentionally make or repeat the same mistakes…

You as Boss need to accept ‘Reality’ that people are in place to do a job because they are capable of doing it…

Motivation by ‘Fear’, fear of being insulted or losing promotion or even losing job only makes me do things focusing on ‘fooling’ you to get over the pseudo danger…

Rewards & Punishment make me deliver ONLY till the level decided by you, it is highly dependent on your illusion / understanding of my capabilities and has nothing to do with my actual capabilities… Which btw, may be zillion times more than your illusion / understanding, just that I have no reason to stretch it so far…

My way of doing things can be completely different from the way you did things when you performed well… I can achieve same or possibly even better results than you did… You need to have faith in me and stop ‘Controlling’ me, rather should try to guide / mentor me as and when they I advise… Please don’t make me hesitant in approaching you for advice… The philosophy of bringing the horse to pond being your job is inconsistent, you as a ‘Mentor’ should also ensure the horse drinks water, failing which horse will die and you’ll have no ride to cross the terrain…

Most of all…. Believe in me that I am NOT ‘Kam Chor’ and I have more than enough ‘Intellectual Creativity’ to do things well…

Please Please Please do invest your attention in understanding that just like any other human being I crave to be a ‘Good & Honest’ person, you just need to make me feel safe for being myself…

Let us together make civilisation of corporate Bosses a better place to be in… :-)

Thanks & Regards,

A Team Member

Wishing you a Peaceful Life!

Deep Mody

A Change Leader

Helping Humans do what they do the best – Be Human